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  • Questionnaire

  • You're in the process of preparing for your divorce. This is an important, emotional, and challenging transition for you and your family. Our VvCP members will be happy to advise you about your options for extra support to make this transition in the best way possible, while still maintaining family ties, financial resources, and quality of life. There are multiple ways to separate. The kind of separation you choose determines the nature and pace of your separation. In order to be able to give you advice, we kindly ask you to answer the questions in our questionnaire. Please do not think too much about the answers, just choose the first answer that comes to mind. On a scale of 1 to 10, please select the answer that best suits your current situation.

Frequently asked questions

Here you will find the answer to some of the most frequently asked questions

Collaborative divorce

Why do both partners have their own attorneys?
Both partners feel equally represented when they have their own attorney. The attorneys look after your interests, but always keep the joint solution in mind. The intention is for both partners to put everything on the table at an early stage, so that there are no unnecessary escalations. Your attorney will go through this process with you, along with a coach, who will always be present to act as the impartial chair for the talks.
Where does the term “collaborative divorce” come from?
Collaborative divorce originated in the United States. According to this method, developed by Stu Webb, divorces are handled in consultation and nothing is ever taken to court. Read more about the term collaborative divorce and its origins here.
Is collaborative divorce an expensive method?
A divorce always costs money, especially when it involves lengthy litigation. In a collaborative divorce, you and your (ex)partner will not go to court. A part of our method, we put together a collaborative divorce team of professionals. From the very beginning, we focus on handling the divorce respectfully, without wasting time unnecessarily. Although there are always several parties involved in the divorce, our method does not have to be expensive. And it is also a sustainable and future-proof way of separating.
We’re not married. Is collaborative separation an option?
Yes, this method is a good solution for anyone who wants to separate consultation, especially when children are involved. If you are registered partners, the issues that have to be addressed for a marriage apply to you, as well. Issues like alimony, guardianship and visiting arrangements need to be outlined in a parenting plan, even if you aren't married. Are there no children involved, but are there issues to be settled around alimony, assets or pension? In that case, the collaborative divorce can also be a good solution, as long as you both want to handle the separation in a respectful way.
How do I convince my partner to handle our divorce like this?
If your partner is not convinced about this kind of divorce, our professionals will help you bring him or her to the table. Sometimes this can be a difficult issue. It may help to tell your partner more about our method and point them to this website.
We’re arguing, is collaborative divorce still an option?
Yes, collaborative divorce is often still possible even if you're arguing with each other. There is always a coach/psychologist on hand at the talks who will help you work through the emotions and frustrations. Then you can work together to find a solution. There is space for your feelings and those of your partner. A divorce goes hand in hand with a lot of sadness, uncertainty and often frustration. Our experienced professionals are intimately familiar with the emotions involved in a divorce. Collaborative divorce is often a good and respectful way to separate, even if you are fighting with each other.
Which experts will be involved in the discussions?
You and your partner will each be assisted by your own attorney. A team is put together that, in addition to the attorneys, includes a coach/psychologist and financial expert. We can also bring in a children's coach if necessary.
What is the difference between collaborative divorce and mediation?
In mediation, you and your partner have the same mediator. In collaborative divorce, both partners have their own attorney. He or she is looking out for your interests, without fighting against the other partner. Both parties are equal. A coach/psychologist guides the emotional side of the divorce process and structures the meetings. The coach intervenes wherever necessary to make sure that conversations continue to maintain a reasonable tone. A financial expert is usually part of the team to ensure that the financial side is handled properly. If necessary, a children's coach will be added to the team, which brings all of the expertise together. Collaborative divorce is the only kind of divorce that uses a multidisciplinary team of professionals. Everyone has the same goal in mind: to help you and your partner divorce in a respectful and sustainable way.
Do we also look at spousal support during the divorce?
Yes, we look at everything that needs to be taken care of when you get divorced. This includes a possible right to spousal support. In the collaborative process, you can make clear arrangements for more issues than you would if you were to go to court. The courts do not take into account individual fears, wishes and your current and future situation.
Is a parenting plan also included?
Yes, when children are involved, drawing up a parenting plan is mandatory. Although you are no longer partners, you still need to make arrangements for the children. After all, you are still responsible for parenting one or more children together. Together with our team of professionals, we will look for the best solutions so that your children will have clarity and peace of mind. We also always discuss the possibility of co-parenting.
What is collaborative divorce?
Collaborative divorce is a good solution for partners who want to handle their divorce with professional guidance and respect for each other and any children, without going through drawn-out legal proceedings. It is also an option for partners who are not married. Read more about collaborative divorce here.
Who is best suited to collaborative divorce?
Collaborative divorce is a good solution for partners who wish to split up in consultation and who need to make clear agreements about the children and/or joint property. This is almost always done according to our method without lengthy court proceedings, and always with respect for the other party. A multidisciplinary team of experts, consisting of attorneys, a financial expert, a coach/psychologist and, if necessary, a child coach, will supervise your divorce. Each partner will be assisted by their own attorney, which means you will always feel supported during the process. Even if there are currently major divides between you and your partner that appear to be unbridgeable, a collaborative divorce can often still be the right solution.
Why isn’t there a court involved?
Collaborative divorce is a different kind of divorce that originated in the United States. The guiding principle of this method is to allow the partners, attorneys and other professionals involved to work together towards a respectful divorce. The parties involved stand side by side, not against each other. All of the professionals involved are trained according to the collaborative divorce method. One of the core pillars of this method is separation without court intervention.

Collaborative practice

I’m diametrically opposed to another party. Is collaborative practice still a solution?
Yes, we have seen in practice that complex disputes and disagreements about inheritance often lend themselves well to collaborative practice. We can help both parties get back on the same page and make sure that these discussions are conducted in a calm, respectful way. In addition, each party is assisted by their own attorney. In addition to the individual party counsellor, a coach is on hand to guide the discussions in the right direction. We can ensure that anger and frustration no longer stand in the way of finding a solution. There is space for emotion, and discussing all of the obstacles is a prerequisite for getting on the same page and finding a solution.
Can my own attorney or financial advisor be involved in the process?
No, that is not an option. Our team consists of professionals who are trained in the collaborative practice method. If your own advisor or coach is a recognised collaborative practice professional and is accepted by the other party, they can be added to the team. Once we reach a solution, the relationship with the professionals will end. You can find an overview of all professionals who are members of the VvCP here.
Is collaborative practice also suitable for personal conflicts?
Yes, in principle the collaborative practice is suitable for assistance in all kinds of legal conflicts. When personal disputes arise, this method can be a way of reaching agreement in consultation without taking the issue to court. The collaborative practice method is mainly used for resolving conflicts around inheritance and estates.
Who is involved in the collaborative practice?
Different professionals are involved in conflicts that are handled with collaborative practice. They work together as a team to solve your conflict in a respectful way. Each party will have their own attorney, who will keep your interests in mind and provide legal help and advice. It is not the intention to harm the other party. In the collaborative practice method, we always look for a solution in consultation. A coach/psychologist is also added to the team, as well as one or more attorneys and a financial expert if necessary. All professionals are affiliated with the VvCP.
What conflicts can be resolved with collaborative practice?
Thanks to the multi-professional approach, collaborative practice is suitable for resolving a wide range of conflicts, even if they are quite complex. That means things like inheritance issues and business conflicts such as shareholder disagreements. A complex dispute can often take a little more time. Our approach is to work towards an appropriate solution for all parties, without unnecessary stress or frustration.
Who is best suited to collaborative practice?
By the time a conflict reaches a certain point, it generally involves major financial and legal interests. Conflict also always evokes emotions. The collaborative practice is a good option for parties who are opposed to each other and want to find a solution without the need for litigation. That could include:
  • Disagreement over inheritance
  • Business disputes
  • Conflicts between shareholders, directors, and partners